With apologies to Jerry Herman

[BOTH]
We'll always be bosom buddies
Friends, brothers, and pals
We'll always be bosom buddies
If life should reject you
There's me to protect you
[TRUMP]
If I say that your saw is vicious-
[MbS]
If I call you pedo-
[BOTH]
It's simply that
Who else but a bosom buddy
Will sit down and tell you the truth?
[BOTH]
We'll always be dear companions
We'll always be scheming
[MbS]
Orphan Annie and Sandy
[BOTH]
Like Amos and Andy
[TRUMP]
I'll always be Alice Toklas
If you'll be Gertrude Stein
And though I'll admit I've dished you
I've gossiped and gloated
But I'm so devoted
[MbS]
And if I say that sex and lies
Made you into a star
It's simply that
Who else but a bosom buddy
Will tell you how rotten you are
[BOTH]
Just turn your bosom buddy
For aid and affection
For help from detection
For loyalty, love, and forsooth
Remember that who else but a bosom buddy
Will sit down and level
And knows you’re the devil
Will sit down and tell you the truth?